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School Bag Packing Checklist

Reduce your child’s anxiety and frustration over forgotten things with this  school bag packing checklist.

We created this printable checklist using some of the beautifully illustrated pictures featured in the TomTag My School Kit Sticker Pack.

Print and put it where your child will see it to help them remember what to take to school each day.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  • Back-to-School Self-Talk Prompt Sheet

  • Back-to-School Toolkit

  • Feelings Bundle

  • I Can Do It Pack My Bag For School Kit

  • My School Kit Sticker Pack

  • School Bag Packing Checklist

 

 

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Toilet Training Record

Toilet training a child is never straightforward. For many autistic or additional needs children the process can often start later, take more planning, and may take longer. But it will be worth the effort in the long run.

Establishing a routine is a huge step in helping your child become toilet trained. 

This record sheet ( available as a download using the link below) can help you develop a toilet routine for your child. Recording your child’s wee and poo habits for 3 ‘typical’ days helps you to identify their wee and poo pattern so you can encourage them to sit on the toilet at around that time. Your notes may also help you spot any signs of constipation that could make toilet training unsuccessful.

Let’s get started

Here is a guide to help you fill in the record sheet;

Mealtime

Write down the time your child has their meals, drinks, and snacks. This helps you track how long it takes between when your child eats or drinks and when he or she is wet or soiled.

It may be helpful to write down what your child drinks. You may see a pattern with the type of drink he or she has and how often or quickly they wee afterward.

Time of wee / Time of poo

Check your child’s nappy or pull up every 30 minutes for wetness or soiling.

Write down the time that any wee or poo is passed

This will help you identify your child’s wee and poo patterns. Use this information to schedule toilet time.

 

Type of poo

Write down the number from the Bristol Stool Chart that best describes the poo—see pictures in the Choose Your Poo table on the left.

Record the size of the poo passed as small/ medium or large

Types 1,2 and 3 suggest constipation. You should contact your child’s doctor for further advice if your child passes these types of poos.

Behaviour change

Write down any behavioural changes you notice before or after your child has passed a wee or a poo. For example, running and hiding, jiggling around, crossing their legs, or clutching at themselves.

Recognising any behavioural changes will help you decide when is a good time to encourage your child to sit on the toilet.

 

 

 

  • I Can Do It Self Care Skills Kit

  • I Can Do It Toilet Routine Mini Kit

  • Self Care Sticker Pack

  • Toilet Training Record Sheet

  • Toilet Training Toolkit in collaboration with Clear Steps Consultancy

 

 

 

 

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Autism and Christmas – Tom’s 21 Tips for an Autism-Friendly Christmas

Christmas can be a magical and exciting time but for many autistic children like my son Tom, the festive period is anything but wonderful.

Tom struggles with changes to his routine, worries about not understanding what is happening and why his usual activities and food are different. When he was younger, if visitors came to the house or we visited family and friends he’d become confused and unsettled as he didn’t know what was expected of him. He was often tearful, frustrated, and distressed.

We tried lots of things and now we know what to do to help Tom and our family have a more enjoyable and relaxing Christmas.  As he turned 21 this year, Tom shares 21 of his favourite tips to help you and your family prepare for an autism-friendly  Christmas. 

#1: Decide what’s the best way to ‘do’ Christmas for YOU and YOUR family.

Making a plan in the following way helped us:

✍🏻Grab a notebook and pen and have a think about the whole upcoming Christmas period.

📝Make a list with four columns headed Achievable, Desirable, High Risk, Impossible

🤔Think about what is planned or expected over Christmas and place each activity under one of the four columns

👏🏻Don’t aim for 💯%- if you can manage most of the achievable, one or two things in the desirable column and come through everything in the risky column you should rightly feel proud.

Don’t give up hope if nothing goes to plan. In our experience, over time many of our risky column activities became achievable.

#2: Make a personalised visual ‘All about Christmas ‘guide.

 Showing all the different things you might do at this time of the year this guide could include Christmas objects, Christmas food and activities that only happen at Christmas e.g., meeting Father Christmas or pulling Christmas crackers

You could make one together like mum and I did with drawings. A photo collage, Christmas scrapbook, or pictures of your family celebrating Christmas also work well.

Like many children with autism, I tend to forget social information, so a permanent visual guide was a great way to remind me what Christmas looks like.   

                                                       

#3: Take time to talk with your child about things that may be worrying them                                                                                  

I was worried about not having my usual breakfast – jammy toast and hot chocolate on Christmas day.

This might seem a little thing to worry about, but it was a huge feeling for me. Mum explained to me that I would have my usual breakfast and that made me feel better.

#4: Make realistic plans for shopping.

Mum tried to avoid taking me shopping during Christmas. The noisy crowds, strong smells, and bright lights in the shops made me feel confused and worried. If she couldn’t find a babysitter, we used to go at quieter times of the day with plenty of snacks to distract me!

Online shopping now makes things much easier

#5: Talk about social rules and different expectations that people might have around Christmastime.

When I was younger, having visitors to my house or going to visit family and friends over Christmas made me feel worried. I didn’t like being out of routine and felt anxious about what I should say and do. Practicing what to say when meeting people and having pictures to remind me what would happen and how I should behave, for example saying hello, please, and thank you really helped.

#6: Talk to your child’s teacher so you know what different things they might be doing and when.

Mum used to have a meeting with my teacher and support assistant to find out what activities were going to be happening and how best to help me.

By letting us know when there would be changes to my routine, for example, doing Christmas crafts instead of my usual lessons or practicing for the carol service I could prepare myself for the changes and didn’t get as anxious. 

Planning for the Christmas party so that I could have my favourite drink and a quiet area to go to when things got too much also made me feel much calmer about going to the party. 

#7: Make a list of special interest gift ideas that you can suggest to relatives and friends when they ask what presents they can buy.

When I was younger, I didn’t get excited about getting toys as presents. But I loved getting things about what I was interested in, for example, lorries and trains. Activities based on my special interests were also good ideas.

Among my favourite Christmas presents were a pillowcase with trains on, a trip to the railway museum and of course getting lots of Eddie Stobart lorries!

#8: Make sure any visual schedules are updated to show any changes to routine or special Christmas events.

Sudden changes to my usual routine like a last-minute practice, craft activity or even something small like moving to a different classroom or popping to see a friend can upset me and cause me to worry. It’s always better to give me as much warning as possible of any changes so I can prepare and cope with them.

It can be exhausting to keep up with all the different things that are happening. A TomTag visual timetable really helps to show me what is happening and when. It’s perfect for use at home and school.

#9: Involve your child in deciding where the decorations should go.

I get worried when there are unexpected changes in things around me. So, if Christmas decorations suddenly appear at home or school, it can shock me. Involving me in deciding where the decorations go and letting me help decorate the Christmas tree can help me feel less overwhelmed.

It’s also important to let me know when the decorations are being taken down too. It’s less stressful for me when there is a warning and a reason given.

#10: Keep sensory armour to hand for trips to the shop, parties, and other festive events where there might be sensory overload.

Loud music, twinkly lights, everything and everyone looking different can be overwhelming for me.

Sensory armour can help and includes:

🎧Headphone to cut out some of the noise and sound. I can also listen to my favourite music to help reassure me when things get tricky

🧢A cap to help shut out some of the flashing lights

🕶Dark glasses to reduce light intensity.

#11: Let your child wear their Christmas costume or party outfit around the house

When possible, buy or make your child’s Christmas costume or party outfit early.

Let them wear it around the house for say, 5-10 minutes over a few days to help them become comfortable with how it feels.

I don’t like the feel of any clothes made out of wool or anything with a label in it as it feels scratchy on my skin.  Fancy dress costumes are also a no-no. I much prefer to wear my own clothes. I don’t mind wearing a Christmas hat– if the label is cut out and I don’t have to wear it for a long time – just long enough for mum to get some photographs is usually ok!

#12: Use an advent calendar or other visual to prepare for and understand the countdown to Christmas.

I used to find traditional advent calendars quite fiddly. When I was younger, we had a large fabric Christmas tree with 24 large, numbered pockets. Each pocket contained chocolate that I could easily reach.

Other ways to make an advent calendar include a Christmas Book Advent Calendar – unwrap a Christmas book each day, little gift boxes filled with knick-knacks, or a treasure hunt with clues.

You can use TomTag to make a fun countdown too!

#13: Prepare your child for how to greet family and friends

Prepare for visitors and visits from family and friends by talking to your child about who they are going to see and how to greet them.

I spent lots of time practicing with mum how to greet people.  Being hugged makes me feel uneasy so I learned how to shake hands with friends and family. I do love being hugged by my sister though!

#14: Discuss the escape plans that it’s ok for your child to use if everything gets too much for them.

It was so important for me to know that if things got too much for me there was a quiet space I could go to ‘escape’ Christmas. When I was younger I agreed with mum that I would show a red card when I needed some time out in the quiet space.

#15: Be prepared that your child might not be able to sit at the table for as long as would like (or maybe not at all).

Be upfront about this with your family and friends if you’re having Christmas dinner at their homes.

I’m happy to sit at the table now for my meal but often need to leave the table when I’ve eaten for a movement break. Knowing that this is OK and that I’m not going to be forced to sit at the table means I don’t get anxious. When I was younger, I had a favourite book or toy to keep me distracted during mealtimes.

#16: For children who won’t eat a traditional Christmas dinner prepare and freeze their meals in advance to reduce the workload on the day.

I used to be a very picky eater. This was because I don’t like changes. I liked things including my food, to be predictable. Having the same foods such as pasta, bread and chips meant I didn’t have to worry about new tastes or feelings in my mouth. I preferred to eat foods that I knew tasted and felt the same.  I also avoided eating meat as this was difficult for me to chew.

My favourite Christmas dinner used to be chicken nuggets and chips – Mum always put some peas on my plate, just in case!

As I’ve got older my fussy eating has changed. I now love a traditional Christmas dinner and my favourite vegetable is broccoli!

#17: Playfully and patiently practice Christmas traditions

These could include receiving and unwrapping presents, pulling crackers, and wearing hats so that your child knows what to expect and can join in.

Here are some things that we did to help me understand what happens at Christmas:

Play wrapping games. Mum wrapped up some of my things – clothes, books, toys and I had to open the paper and find what was inside. We’d play a guessing game by trying to guess what was inside by the feel and shape of the parcel. We used to have something square, round and rectangular so I could also practice my shape names.  Chocolate was always my favourite thing to unwrap!

Pulling crackers. We bought some cheap crackers and practiced pulling them, so I got used to the ‘bang’ sound and it didn’t come as a surprise. I got used to wearing the paper hat from the cracker and looking for the joke inside them.

#18: Think and talk about the sensory overload and extra social demands at Christmas parties.

The school Christmas party used to be very overwhelming for me. Loud music, everybody looking different and the expectation that I should be joining in with dancing and games. 

These things helped the party be less stressful for me:

📝Using a visual schedule showing me what was going to happen

🤗Having a ‘buddy group of friends to help me join in

🕺🏻Practicing dancing at home!

🤫Making sure there was a quiet place for me to go to if things got too much.

 

#19: Some children may be overwhelmed by many presents all in one go. Try introducing gifts one at a time over the day or over several days.

Alternatively, adopt an advent style approach and bring out a small gift each day on the run-up to Christmas day.

On Christmas day, I used to stagger my present opening. I opened some presents in the morning and some in the afternoon. Often, we went on holiday at Christmas time so I would open most of my presents after Christmas once we were back home and in my own time. This worked well for me as I didn’t feel stressed about deciding what to unwrap and doing it all at once.  I could enjoy opening my presents.

#20: Leave some areas of the house undecorated so there’s always a quiet place for your child to retreat to if they need it.

I liked having a Christmas-free zone to escape to when I got fed up with the flashing lights, glittery things, and loud music around the house.  This decoration-free space helped me feel calmer when things got too much.

#21: Many autistic children don’t like surprises so it might help not to wrap presents up.

You could also just tell them what’s inside or use clear cellophane or plain paper for wrapping with a picture attached showing what’s inside.

When I was younger, it didn’t bother me to get a wrapped present, but I didn’t have the ‘surprise feeling’ you usually get before you open it. I didn’t really understand the idea of a surprise, so I had a mixture of wrapped and unwrapped presents.

I used to love anything to do with numbers so receiving a large pack of number cards one Christmas was a lovely surprise!

Tom and I would love to know any tips you have to make Christmas more autism-friendly? 

Clare & Tom x

Useful resources:

  • Christmas & Birthdays Sticker Pack

  • A yellow cover sheet stating Christmas Survival Guide showing an images of a Christmas tree and Father Christmas

    Christmas Survival Guide

  • Christmas Survival Toolkit

  • I Know What To Expect At Christmas & Birthdays Kit

  • I Know What To Expect-My Christmas Day Mini Kit

  • Phoebe’s Green Christmas Kit in collaboration with Embracing Arts & Christmas For Kids

  • Phoebe’s Green Christmas Sticker Pack in collaboration with Embracing Arts & Christmas For Kids

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How Self-Talk Helps with Back-to-School Anxiety

Self-talk was key in helping Tom manage his back-to-school anxiety.

 Self-talk is rehearsing silently something that you think someone you trust would say to you in a situation you find tricky or challenging. Being able to self-talk is useful as it is something a child can do to help themselves. It has been a game-changer for Tom as he can use this whenever he is feeling overwhelmed.

Let’s get started

You can use this Prompt Sheet to help your child develop self-talk to manage their back-to-school anxiety. 

Here are our tips for using the sheet which is available as a free download using the link below:

  • Let your child know that lots of people are anxious about going back to work or school. This helps them feel that their worries about going back to school are valid.
  • Give your child the words to describe their feelings. Introducing and explaining the phrases ‘back to school blues’ and the ‘oh no feeling’ help them understand the emotion and feeling behind their back-to-school anxiety.
  • Ask your child to show you how strong their ‘oh no feeling ‘is. If they struggle with language try simple visual scales using either numbers ( 1-5) or the intensity of colours (green – red) to make it easier for them to rate their feelings. The TomTag feelings tag, a thermometer-style sequence of 6 feelings faces, is a good option to use.
  • Explain that their ‘oh no feeling’ is the right feeling but too big. Like a shout that needs to be shrunk to the right size – a whisper. The drawings  on the Prompt Sheet are a good way to show this
  • Tell them that to shrink the ‘oh no feeling’ they should think of 3 good reasons why going back to school is ok and say these reasons to themselves when they feel the ‘oh no feeling’ starting

Rating anxiety levels 

Tom used his I can do it Share How I feel Tag to show us the intensity of his feelings about going back to school. 

If you have any tips to share on reducing back-to-school anxiety please leave a comment below. 

  • Back-to-School Self-Talk Prompt Sheet

  • Back-to-School Toolkit

  • Feelings Bundle

  • I Can Do It Pack My Bag For School Kit

  • My School Kit Sticker Pack

  • School Bag Packing Checklist

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Organising My School Bag

‘Have you got your…?

Imagine being able to send your child off to school without the usual dramas, panic, shouts, and screams over lunch boxes, PE kits or homework!

Anxieties over forgotten items can be avoided with a little preparation and practice.

When children have the  skills to pack their school bag independently, they can start taking responsibility for their belongings without you having to remind them all the time. This also helps them at the end of the school day when they need to know what to bring home again.

Even the youngest or most disorganised child can soon get the hang of finding and packing everything they need for school, giving them a great sense of achievement too.

Visual checklists are an ideal tool to use when helping your child learn how to get organised and become more independent.

Find the right school bag

With so many bags to choose from it is important to find one that matches your child’s needs.

The main consideration is comfort.
• Does the bag feel good to wear?
• Do the straps feel sufficiently strong?
• When filled, is the weight of the bag evenly spread about?

Choose a sturdy bag that has multiple compartments and zipped pockets. Check that all the fastenings work cleanly and it is easy to access. If you child gets frustrated finding things or struggles with fiddly zips, opt for fewer pockets and Velcro fastenings instead.

Let’s get organised

Start with an empty school bag.

Ask your child to sort out their school things into clear categories. For example, school supplies such as pens, pencils, notebook, communication book in one pile. Items that go back and forth to school like lunch boxes, water bottles and PE kit in another pile.

Assign each item to a compartment or pocket. A big compartment can be for books and their lunch box. A smaller pocket for writing equipment.

A school-home folder is ideal for any loose papers, letters, or permission sheets that need to go back to school.

Make a map

Once everything has its place, help your child draw a picture of their school bag and label what goes where. This school bag ‘map’ will help remind them where things go when they are packing up for the
next day.

Encourage your child to practice emptying their bag and putting everything back in the right place.

Keep a copy of the map in the front pocket of their school bag plus a copy at home.

Pack all the right kit

Use a simple checklist attached to their school bag listing all the things they need to remember to take to school for each day of the week. The checklist should be sturdy and easily seen. Using different coloured lists makes it easy to identify the right list for each day.

Picture cues work well for younger children or non-readers as well as older children and those with additional needs such as dyslexia, dyspraxia, autism, or ADHD.

Getting into the habit of packing the night before is a great way to avoid the last-minute panic searching for homework or PE kit in the morning when you really should be leaving the house!

Bear in mind that children may need lots of practice before they can organise and pack their school bag independently.

Give lots of opportunities to practice these techniques and make forgotten school items a thing of the past.

Make your own checklists

We used the TomTag   I can do it pack my bag for school kit to make the examples shown. 

If you have any tips to share on organising school bags please leave a comment below.

 

  • Back-to-School Toolkit

  • I Can Do It Pack My Bag For School Kit

  • Organising My School Bag

  • School Bag Packing Checklist

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Help autistic children manage changes to routines with TomTag visual supports

My autistic son Tom (the inspiration for TomTag visual schedules) struggles with changes to his routines. His autism means that he perceives the world differently to other people. For him, the world can often seem a strange, unpredictable, and confusing place. It is understandable why he craves the stability and predictability of repetitive routines and activities, and the comfort of familiar food.  However, as a wise man once said, the only constant in life is change. Learning how to be flexible and less rigid about routines is a crucial life skill. It is one that Tom has developed over the years, with the help of visual supports.

Visual schedules are a great tool for teaching flexibility around changes to routines.  This may seem surprising – surely a schedule means sticking to a repetitive routine? However, it’s not the visual schedule that makes changes to a routine difficult but the way it is used.⁣

In this blog, I’d like to share with you an approach you can use with TomTag visual schedules to help your child be less rigid and more tolerant of changes to their routines.

Use a schedulered tomtag button holder with symbols in sequence for morning routine

Make sure that your child understands how their schedule works and uses it regularly. If your child doesn’t  understand their schedule or use it regularly then it is unrealistic to expect them to deal with changes to it.

Need some support  introducing visual schedules ? The TomTag Show me how:Timetables and routines guide can help. 

I am flexibleGrey button holder showing buttons for change of routine activity

A TomTag I am flexible tag is a great way to introduce your child to changes to routines when used alongside their normal routine tag. Using the format ‘instead of ‘  …  ‘I am flexible’…  is a simple visual way to familarise your child with a proposed change in their routine.

Words can have a powerful effect.  I am flexible is a positive affirmation that will  give your child  a sense of achievement and boost their self esteem.

 

Start with positive changesred and grey tomTag button holders showing symbols for changes to routines

Start with something positive, for example, a change to a preferred activity or food choice.

In the examples shown- sand play instead of inside play, fish fingers instead of pizza (go with the preferred activities/ food choices for your child!)

Start with a change that is not upsetting. This also reinforces the idea that a change does not always have to be negative.

Giving initial warningsTwo purple and one grey TomTag button holders showing symbols for a morning routine with a change of activity

Although the aim is to get to a stage when you don’t have to give warnings  about changes – life is unpredictable after all – you shouldn’t expect your child to immediately accept changes without doing the necessary groundwork. 

Like all new skills, the best way to learn is to break the skill down into small sequential steps. 

  • Refer to their morning schedule tag and show them the proposed change. In this example, if their morning routine shows inside play then show them the I am flexible tag with the new play activity at the earliest opportunity e.g. before breakfast.
  •  Ask them to change the activity on their schedule to the new activity themselves. Our symbol packs include 2 copies of every symbol so you don’t have to worry about running out of symbols. Their morning schedule tag now shows the new activity.
  • Keep the I am flexible tag handy. Depending on your child’s level of understanding, a short verbal explanation of why the change has taken place would also be helpful.
  • Give another warning just before the changed activity happens. Show your child the I am flexible tag to reinforce your verbal warning. This will help them remember the change and prepare for it.

Praise and encouragementA golden star in a green box saying well done.

Praise your child specifically for handling the change well using supportive positive statements like, “I like how well you managed it when we changed the schedules” or “Change can be hard, but you are doing a great job!”

Saying “You are so brave handling that change in the schedule without getting upset!”  is particularly useful if your child is very anxious about change.

Try not to say “See it wasn’t so bad was it!” as this could belittle your child’s genuine feelings of anxiety about changes and make them feel anxious about having these feelings. 

Fade the warnings

Once your child can manage changes to their routines with warnings, start moving the warnings nearer to the time when the actual change is going to happen. 

So in the example tags  I have used above, you could move the warning about the change of play activity to later in the morning. 

Be consistent

Make sure that your child’s schedule is always accurate.

Being prepared makes changes to routines so much easier to manage. It also keeps the schedule consistent so your child knows they can rely on it.

I hope you find  this approach useful in helping your child learn to accept and manage changes to their routine.

Want to make your own schedules, routines and I am flexible tags like the ones shown in the examples here or need more advice before getting started on introducing routines or changes to routines? Take a look at the resources below or get in touch with Clare via our contact page.

Resources

  • Back-to-School Toolkit

  • Early Years Home Toolkit

  • Early Years Sticker Pack

  • I Can Do It Learn At Home Kit

  • I Know What To Expect – Morning and Evening Mini Kit

  • I Know What To Expect At Home Kit

  • I Know What To Expect Early Years Kit

  • I Know What To Expect-My Christmas Day Mini Kit

  • Learn At Home Sticker Pack

  • Morning and Evening Routines Sticker Sheet

  • STICKER SHEET SHOWING 20 WIDGIT SYMBOLS

    Non School Day Routines Sticker Sheet

  • Primary Years Home Toolkit

  • School Bag Packing Checklist

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Household chores -Teach children life skills with TomTag

Yellow tag howing wshing up routine and washing up on draining board

Set your child up well for later life by by helping them learn a life skill such as household chores when they’re young (and eager!).  

Children learn how to look after themselves and their home and become familiar with concepts such as teamwork and the discipline of routine. Household chores can also be a way to improve self-worth and encourage independence for the future.

We all like the feeling that we can help! Make use of the increased shared time we are having together at the moment and  give your child a sense of pride and accomplishment at being able to contribute and enjoy some time with you.

 TomTag is an ideal tool for teaching a life skill such as household chores. Here’s some ideas from our Help at Home kit of how you might use it :-Blue, red and yellow tags showing household chores

  • Use a set of tags to give step-by-step instructions for cleaning different rooms in the house.
  • Label a tag with the name of each child and list the chores they need to complete that day/week.
  • List the jobs you want completing on separate tags. Let each child pick a tag out of a hat to find out what their task is.

Start them young

Building good habits from an early age always makes things easier in the long run. Children as young as 2 years old can pick up their own toys, put dirty clothes in a washing basket and wield a duster.

 

 


Make it fun

Turning tasks into a game always makes things more fun. Turn the radio up and dance while hoovering, shout out colour names when sorting laundry or let kids compete to be the first to tidy their room (to your standard!).


The right chores

This will naturally depend on your child’s age and developmental level. You’ll find plenty of guides online but you’re the best judge of what your child’s ready for. Watering plants is always a favourite in our house. Who doesn’t like pouring water! Build up gradually to the more difficult tasks so they don’t get frustrated if they can’t complete the task independently. Our Pinterest Household Chores board has lots of ideas for age-appropriate chores.

 


A family affair

Set a good example by making sure that everyone helps out – in an age-appropriate way. If you child is old enough, involve them in a family discussion to decide who should do what around the house. Offer options so that children can choose the jobs they prefer. If no-one wants to do a particular task (such as cleaning the toilet!), use a rota system so that everyone takes a turn.

 


Praise and encouragement

Don’t expect perfection, especially at first or if they are very young. Praise those things they did well and they’ll feel proud of what they got right and motivated to do the job again next time. Tell them how much it helped you and they’ll feel they are making an important contribution to the family.

 


Reward

This will depend on your own family values and views but if you want to add an extra incentive, chores can be linked to giving pocket money or earning other treats. Use a blank sticker to add a £ button to each chore checklist, like this one for helping out at mealtimes and doing the dishes.

mealtime chore photo

 

Resources

  • Clean & Tidy Sticker Pack

  • I Can Do It Help At Home Kit

  • I Can Do It Independent Living Kit

 

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Getting dressed – TomTag Tips to help Autistic Children learn dressing skills

Plastic yellow tag showing sequence of clothing items

 Getting dressed independently is an important life skill for autistic children. Teaching dressing skills to my autistic son required a lot of time, practice, and patience.Putting on clothes in the right order, fastening buttons and zips and tying shoelaces involves mastering many skills. Add sensory triggers into the mix and it is easy to see why it took him longer to develop dressing skills compared with other children his age.

 However, it is worth the effort. Being able to get dressed by themselves gives autistic children confidence to function independently at school and it’s one less thing for you to worry about in the mornings!

Now is the perfect time for your autistic child to start developing their dressing skills. With schools closed, there’s no pressure to get everyone fed, dressed and out of the front door in the morning so there’s plenty of time to practice at your child’s own pace.

Let’s practice!

Getting dressed takes a lot of motor skills that autistic children may need time to develop. Balance and co-ordination of movements are needed to get their limbs in all the right places. Fine motor skills help them deal with many types of fastenings. 

Improving motor skills does not have to be boring! Here are some activities you can do at home with your child to make practice fun.

  • Practice balance by making a line on the floor and step with one foot in front of the other like “tightrope walking”. You could make it more interesting by pretending that they are walking a tightrope across a river full of snapping crocodiles!
  • Work on fine motor skills with a hidden treasure hunt. Fill a tub with rice or another pulse and hide small objects such as cars, or small figures and ask your child to find them. Sand play and messy play are also activities which practice fine motor skills.
  • Therapy putty is ideal for developing the hand strength needed to manipulate clothing and fastenings.

coloured buckets fuoll of sand and tag showing choice of play activtiesUse a TomTag visual list to help your child choose their preferred activity. Our new Early Years Activities sticker pack has lots  of activities that make fine motor skill practice part of playtime.

Getting Dressed

Once you’re ready to practice dressing try ‘backward chaining‘ . This method lets the child feel accomplished every time. They start with the last step then work backward from there.

Little changes can make a big difference in reducing your child’s frustrations while dressing. Here are some things you can do to make things easier for them.

Clothes

plastic yellow tag showing dressing sequence and yellow t shirt and blu jeans

 

  • Choose trousers or skirts with elasticated waists where possible and opt for loose fitting items with velcro or large buttons which are easier to put on than tight fitting ones.
  • Use a simple visual checklist like TomTag showing what order each item of clothing should be put on. You could also lay the clothes out in the shape of a body to help with visualisation.
  • Offer a choice, “ you can wear the blue shirt or the red shirt”.
  • Lay out clothes the night before, making sure they are the right side out.
  • Organise the wardrobe separating play clothes, school clothes and ‘going out’ clothes

 socksSocks

  • Begin with large, short socks that slip more easily over the feet.
  • Show  your child how to scrunch longer socks up first before pulling them on
  • Socks with colored heels make it easier to get them the right way round. We love the brightly coloured Ez Socks  from Special Kids Company that also have handy pull up loops.
  • Try Little Grippers school socks for socks that stay on – and up! – all day long.

shoesShoes

  • Having a designated place for shoes will save valuable time spent hunting for them
  • Start with slip on shoes or use no tie elastic laces such as Hickies, Greepers and Lock Laces
  • Teach shoe tying with a  step by step approach. The ‘bunny ears’ is a popular method and YouTube is an excellent resource for demonstrations of this and other tying methods.

coatCoat

  • Start practising with different, larger types of coat.
  • If the sleeve by sleeve approach isn’t working try this flip flop over the top method  wonderfully described by Connectability.ca – you might want to stand well back until they get better at this one though!
  • Attach a zip pull or a key ring to the zip to help with gripping the tab and make zipping easier.

starWell done!

Don’t forget to give plenty of praise to your child for their efforts at each stage and consider using a star chart to help them establish their routine.

 

Sensory and developmental issues 

If your child is sensitive to clothing consider how to reduce their sensory triggers .

Check for labels and seams that might cause irritation and cut them out where possible. Wash clothes several times before wearing to help  soften them. 

The Sensory Smart Store started by a mum of an autistic boy with sensory processing disorder has a great range of clothes to help sensitive and sensory children and adults. Whilst EcoOutfitters offer school clothing made from 100% pure organic cotton.

Dressing in front of a mirror provides important visual cues that can help a child with sequencing, body planning and body awareness. If your child continues to have difficulty with dressing, a qualified occupational therapist should be able to help.

Have you any tips or experiences to share about teaching dressing skills? We’d love to hear from you in the comments below.

Resources

  • Back-to-School Toolkit

  • I Can Do It Learn At Home Kit

  • I Can Do It Self Care Skills Kit

  • I Know What To Expect At Home Kit

  • School Morning Routines

  • Self Care Sticker Pack

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted on

Autism and anxiety in lockdown – sweating it out!

Exercise routine

This year’s World Autism Awareness Week takes place against the backdrop of a global pandemic. With a third of the global population under lockdown our daily lives have been dramatically changed. Forced to remain in our houses and adapt to new circumstances, many of us will be feeling bewildered, frustrated and anxious.

Sweating it out!

The anxiety many of us are now experiencing around these unprecedented changes gives us an insight into how many young people with autism, like my son Tom, experience an unwanted change of plan – it’s fraught with worry, it’s out of anything we could have predicted and it’s not what we wanted.

Our ‘new normal’ in these strange and unsettling times is very much how he feels all the time. Imagine having to deal with that level of anxiety every single day!

So, given everyone’s heightened levels of anxiety how can you manage autism and anxiety in a lockdown?

We’d like to share some daily strategies which we are using to support Tom’s mental health during this lockdown period. We’ve called it the SWEAT approach – let’s sweat this one out!

tips for good mental health
Daily SWEAT

Socialise – maintain social connections

Tom misses his dad, grandparents and college friends. Thankfully technology makes it relatively easy to keep connected. However, just as in normal social situations, we’re careful not to put demands on him to socialise virtually either.  We offer him a choice of how he stays connected and how often he wants to have contact.

Work – provide structure and routine

written timetable
Tom’s written weekly timetable

Routines and rituals help establish stability and order for children and young people with autism like Tom.

Like many young people with autism Tom struggles with flexible thinking. That means he finds it difficult to adjust and readjust to changes in his routine and this can cause him anxiety. A useful strategy has been to highlight what has stayed the same and what has changed. This reassures him that even with all the uncertainty some things, like his college work, mealtimes and bedtime routines, remain the same.

Keeping familiar routines going as much as possible is therefore important to provide structure and reassurance. Tom accesses his college work and sessions with his speech therapist, English tutor and German teacher online. A simple written visual schedule shows him what to expect each day and can help navigate these confusing times. You can also create symbol-based home visual schedules quickly and easily with TomTag.

However, it’s important not to set the bar to high! Be mindful that there will be days when the ‘home-schooling’ isn’t done and instead it is just a day of being together. An example of this was during the recent warm weather when we abandoned the schedule and went for a family walk.

Emotions – share worries and concerns

talking at table
Discussing concerns

Set aside time each day to talk about worries and concerns. Try to contain your own anxieties around the current situation because this anxiety gets transferred to our children. Now more than ever our autistic children need patience and support from the people they love.

Tom, like all of us, is naturally worried about events and this is amplified by worries about whether he is catching or spreading the disease.

We keep news coverage to a minimum and explain things in a clear and consistent manner using language appropriate to his level of understanding.

Making a wish list, where we write down all the things we want to do after the pandemic has passed, is also working well – though at the moment, it mostly revolves around football and Swiss trains!

Active – encourage physical activities

Keeping active is good for both our physical and mental well being. Tom has a daily fitness programme and he’s set up an exercise challenge with his speech therapist.

using exercise bike
Tom training hard!

Focusing on activities and encouraging him to do some chores – like washing the car and helping his sister deliver essential shopping to his self-isolating grandparents and other vulnerable members of the community – provides positive reinforcement that is so vital to keep up his self-esteem, confidence and sense of purpose.

Time alone – relax with special interests

reading book
Spending time alone

Build in lots of down time, together with time to indulge special interests. With all the family thrust together it’s important for mental well being that we all carve out some time for ourselves.

It’s a difficult time for all of us particularly for children with autism and anxiety. Hopefully by following these strategies we can sweat out this lockdown period.

What tips can you share that make this lockdown period more manageable and less stressful in your house?

Posted on

Home Visual Schedules For Autistic Children-TomTag Tips

If you’re a parent of an autistic child, the chances are you have been advised to use a visual schedule at home. But where do you start and is it really worth the effort?

In this blog, we discuss the reasons why home visual schedules can help autistic children and how you can get started with using them.

Why should you use visual schedules at home?

Using a visual schedule at home will help to build a sense of consistency, predictability, and security

Visual schedules at home can help you to communicate to your child when activities or events will happen throughout the day.

They use a sequence of drawings, symbols, text or pictures to show what a child is expected to do.

The more children can anticipate what is happening, the safer and more secure they will feel.

Tips for creating home visual schedules

Here are some of the tips that we have taken from our Show me guide – visual timetables, Schedules and Routines.

We call it the TomTag 4 P’s approach!

Plan

Notebook and pencil for planning schedules
Planning is key

Depending on your child’s developmental age, sit down each evening and try and plan out a rough schedule for the next day. Decide which activities for the day or part of the day you want to show. Choose the length of the schedule that you think will be appropriate for your child and adjust as necessary.

A simple daily visual schedule could include some education, fun activities and chill time (for them and you!) to help give some meaning and purpose to the day. If you’re interested in creating or using educational resources have a look at Twinkl and Education.com.

Try to replicate some elements of your child’s typical day. For example, encourage them to get dressed, brush their teeth, eat breakfast, etc. You could use a mini schedule to target these specific skills by breaking down a single activity into smaller steps.

Symbols showing a bedtime routine
Example of an evening routine using Widgit symbols

Make sure the schedule includes things like bedtime, time for exercise and meals. You could also consider giving children a chore or job to do to help them feel useful. This could be as simple as clearing the table or putting away their clothes.

Setting aside time every day to do a family activity that you know helps everyone in times of stress is also important. This could be watching a movie or playing a game.

Worried about challenging behaviour?

Try starting with activities that your child usually does willingly. It makes sense to structure the day so that harder tasks are done first when children are likely to be more rested. After schoolwork or chores are complete you can follow with easier tasks as a reward for accomplishing the harder tasks.

Prepare

Boy playing with lego as shown on his visual schedule

A home visual timetable or schedule doesn’t have to be complicated– a simple written, maybe colour-coded, chart pinned on the wall so your children can see it and refer to it will do the trick. 

There’s lots of examples of visual schedules and timetables online to copy or download. For a quick and easy way to create home visual schedules our TomTag Primary Home toolkit or Early Years Home toolkit are great options.

Prompt

Most children will be used to seeing a visual timetable and prompts at school to show them what to expect during the day. Introduce a visual schedule at home using the following steps:

  • Cue your child with a brief verbal instruction when its time for an activity to begin e.g. “check your schedule”
  • Gently guide them to look at it or place it in their hands and prompt them to look at the next activity picture
  • Using the least amount of words, describe the activity e.g. get dressed
  • Help them do the activity or model how to do it.
  • Praise them for completing the activity
  • Cue them to check their schedule again so they can move smoothly onto the next activity.
  • Fade the prompts once your child learns how to follow the schedule

Patience

Keep prompting, praising, and be patient!

It may take some time but it’s also important to acknowledge the pressure we’re all under. If the schedule goes pear-shaped, take a break and try again another time.

 

Helpful resources

Five Minute Mum is a great blog offering lots of ideas for keeping children occupied during the day.

Recommended TomTag products

  • Back-to-School Toolkit

  • Early Years Home Toolkit

  • Early Years Sticker Pack

  • I Can Do It Learn At Home Kit

  • I Know What To Expect – Morning and Evening Mini Kit

  • I Know What To Expect At Home Kit

  • I Know What To Expect Early Years Kit

  • I Know What To Expect-My Christmas Day Mini Kit

  • Learn At Home Sticker Pack

  • Morning and Evening Routines Sticker Sheet

  • STICKER SHEET SHOWING 20 WIDGIT SYMBOLS

    Non School Day Routines Sticker Sheet

  • Primary Years Home Toolkit

  • School Bag Packing Checklist

Maybe you have a tip on how best to use visual schedules at home? Please get in touch or leave a comment below.